“It’s Not You, It’s Me” – Canada to U.K., April 17, 1982

Hey there, United Kingdom. It’s been 30 years since we’ve gone our separate ways, but it feels like just yesterday, doesn’t it?

The split was something of an “It’s not you, it’s me” scenario. We were a young country in 1982. We had nothing against you per se, but we needed our space and room to breathe. As a nation, we hoped to secure an independent identity for ourselves. There were things we wanted to do before we settled down, like forge our own Charter of Rights and Freedoms. And just because we completely broke away from the U.K., it didn’t mean you weren’t still in our hearts or the Queen on our money.

We reside on separate continents, so that made the breakup a little easier. And we weren’t all that similar. For example, most of our rowdiest brawls take place on the hockey rink, while yours take place in the soccer stands. You call an elevator a “lift,” and we call the boot of a car the “trunk.” It would have never worked out in the long run.

After the split, you got custody of the crown jewels and the monarchy, and we got an angry Quebec. It was fair, considering we’re the ones who asked for the breakup. It hasn’t always been easy; these things never are. Our Charter was a tough sell to the provinces early on, with give and take on all sides (and though Quebec still isn’t on board, we love them anyway).

Now, though, we’ve had our Charter for 30 years, and its power has been invoked in pivotal moments in our nation’s growth. We’ve tackled a variety of human rights issues with it and, while we’re not perfect, we’re not doing too badly for ourselves.

Of course, Canada and the U.K. still cross paths from time to time, at the United Nations or international sporting events. The monarchy comes to visit every once in a while, and we gleefully follow the latest royal hat trends from across the pond.

The main thing is we’ve remained friends. That isn’t always easy to do after a split. You should know – you’re home to the British tabloids. So thanks for being so good about it all, U.K. Feel free to drop by anytime for a cup of tea, on us. We hope Red Rose is okay.

-Mike Crisolago