Toronto Maple Leafs: Is losing really “unacceptable”?

“Unacceptable” is a word you’ll hear a lot these days if you’re a Toronto Maple Leafs hockey fan. The term is frequently tossed around by Leaf players (Dion Phaneuf and Phil Kessel lead the league in this department) and coaches when attempting to explain one of the following: another blow-out defeat, terrible defensive play, shoddy goaltending, slow start, mental lapse, poor effort, long winless streak or any other bad play that’s contributed to loss after loss after loss after mind-numbing loss.

Players resort to using “unacceptable” to show fans they’re aware of what’s going wrong and are big enough to shoulder some of the blame for the latest woeful performance.

But really, by using the term, they’re just whitewashing the truth, excusing their poor play. Because if they were at all convinced their play was “unacceptable,” they’d take obvious steps to correct it.

So, in this bleakest of years, a fun exercise is watch out for any time a Leaf player uses the phrase “it’s unacceptable” and replace it with more truthful phrase “on this team, it’s acceptable”. It certainly makes a lot more sense that way. Or, simply change the quote to get a more accurate measure of what the player or coach in question really meant to say.

 

Oct. 12, 2014
5-2 loss to Pittsburgh Penguins
Phil Kessel

What he said: “It’s only two games in, but it’s unacceptable.”

Truth be told: “It’s only two games in, but on this team, it’s acceptable.”

What he really meant: “It’s only two games in, but … what makes you think anything has changed from last year?”

 

Oct. 12, 2014
5-2 loss to Pittsburgh Penguins
Coach Randy Carlyle

What he said“Penalties in the offensive zone are unacceptable.”

Truth be told: “Penalties in the offensive zone, on this team, they’re acceptable.”

What he really meant: “Penalties in the offensive zone are going to get me fired by January.”

 

Nov. 18, 2014
9-2 loss to Nashville Predators
Phil Kessel

What he said“It’s unacceptable, right?”

Truth be told: “On this team, it’s acceptable, right?”

What he really meant: “What a half-assed effort it was tonight, right? Let’s not salute the fans after the game.”

 

Dec 20, 2014
 7-4 loss to Philadelphia Flyers
Dion Phaneuf

What he said: “It’s unacceptable we are hanging our goalies out to dry.”

Truth be told: “On this team, it’s acceptable we are hanging our goalies out to dry.”

What he really meant: “We proudly uphold the time-honoured Leaf tradition of hanging our goalies out to dry.”

 

Jan. 17, 2015
3-0 loss to St. Louis Blues
Dion Phaneuf

What he said: “The bottom line is we went on a road trip and we are going home 0-4. I don’t think there is much more to sugarcoat it. It’s unacceptable.”

Truth be told: “The bottom line is we went on a road trip and we are going home 0-4. I don’t think there is much more to sugarcoat it. On this team, it’s acceptable.”

What he really meant: “The bottom line is we went on a road trip and we are going home 0-4. I don’t think there is much more to sugarcoat it. Obviously, my $8 million salary makes it all a lot easier.”

 

Feb. 12, 2015
3-2 loss to New York Islanders
Phil Kessel

What he said: “It was another bad start for us. Not good. It’s unacceptable,”  said.

Truth be told: “It was another bad start for us. Not good. But on this team, it’s acceptable.

What he really meant: “It was another bad start for us. Good thing I stopped giving a crap in December.”

 

Feb. 10, 2015
5-4 loss to New York Rangers
Coach Peter Horachek

What he said“We were awful.”

Truth be told: Wait, he didn’t use the word unacceptable!

What he really meant. “For the love of God, Shanny, blow this team up!”