Joke of the day for June 24

Zoomer | June 24th, 2012

1. The two most common elements in the universe are hydrogen and stupidity. But not in that order – Brian Pickrell

2. Never miss an opportunity to make others happy, even if you have to leave them alone in order to do it – Author unknown

3. He has a face like a Saint – A Saint Bernard – Unknown

4. I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that I don’t know the answer – Douglas Adams

5. The empty vessel makes the greatest sound – William Shakespeare

6. Silence and smile are two powerful words. Smile is the way to solve many problems and Silence is the way to avoid many problems – Anon

7. Knowledge talks, wisdom listens

8. There cannot be a crisis next week. My schedule is already full – Henry Kissinger

9. He could start a row in an empty house – Sir Alex Ferguson on footballer Dennis Wise

10. I have never killed a man, but I have read many obituaries with great pleasure – Clarence Darrow

11. He has all the virtues I dislike, and none of the vices I admire – Winston Churchill

12. I used to be indecisive, now I’m not so sure – W.C. Fields

13. In the book of life, the answers aren’t in the back – Charlie Brown

14. To succeed in life, you need three things: a wishbone, a backbone and a funny bone – Reba McEntire

15. Never take life seriously. Nobody gets out alive anyway – Anon

16. Mistakes are painful when they happen, but years later a collection of mistakes called Experience leads us to success

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