Joke of the day for August 19

Seven Retirement One-liners to Work into Your Leaving Speech

1. Active socially: Drinks heavily.
2. Character above reproach: Still one step ahead of the law.
3. Excels in the effective application of skills: Makes a good cup of coffee.
4. Internationally known: Likes to go to conferences and trade shows in Las Vegas.
5. Is well informed: Knows all office gossip and where all the skeletons are kept.
6. Tactful in dealing with superiors: Knows when to keep mouth shut.
7. Willing to take calculated risks: Doesn’t mind spending someone else’s money.

Source: Will and Guy’s Funny Jokes