Today’s Joke: July 4
The Perks of Being Over 40
- Kidnappers are not very interested in you.
- In a hostage situation you are likely to be released first.
- No one expects you to run into a burning building.
- People no longer view you as a hypochondriac.
- There is nothing left to learn the hard way.
- Things you buy now won’t wear out.
- You can eat dinner at 4 PM.
- You can live without sex but not without glasses.
- You enjoy hearing arguments about pension plans.
- You have a party and the neighbors don’t even realize it.
- You no longer think of speed limits as a challenge.
- You quit trying to hold your stomach in, no matter who walks into the room.
- You sing along with elevator music.
- Your eyes won’t get much worse.
- Your investment in health insurance is finally beginning to pay off.
- Your joints are a more accurate meteorologist than the national weather service.
- Your secrets are safe with your friends because they can’t remember them either.
- Your supply of brain cells is finally down to manageable size.
Source: Butler’s Web