Groundhog bites the dust
Wiarton Willie, Canada’s master meteorologist, is dead. The psychic rodent passed away quietly on Sunday, tragically missing his annual day in the spotlight (or shadow) when he would pronounce on the prospects of spring for anxious Canadians.
The beloved Willie, who was a spry 23 years old (176 in groundhog years) died in his sleep of natural causes, according to early reports. His death was kept secret until yesterday, when Groundhog Festival officials in the Ontario town of Wiarton released the sad news.
There have already been accusations of a cover-up in Willie’s sudden demise, with some observers noting that Willie’s American rival, Punxsutawney Phil, is now the “lone groundhog” working in meteorology. Phil, who predicted an early spring this morning from his grassy knoll in Pennsylvania, offered no comment on Willie’s death.