Internet support for widows and widowers

Becoming widowed is one of life’s most traumatic events. In the first days after losing a spouse, the bereaved individual is surrounded by family and friends. But it’s a natural tendency for even the most thoughtful of friends and neighbours to go back to old patterns and their regular lives.

Meanwhile the newly widowed person is often still struggling with grief. If the loss was unexpected, the shock may just be fading right at the time that others seem to lose interest. And it can be hard to reach out and ask for help.

Useful and uplifting links
When that late-night sorrow and loneliness hits, some survivors are finding a new tool for help – the internet. And it’s not a bad resource. There is a lot of useful information available online to help widows and widowers get through some of the difficult times. Some links to follow are:

The Seniors Canada On-line support resources for grief and loss:
www.seniors.gc.ca/scolPortSearchScreen.jsp?&font=0&lang=en&geo=0&cat=635

The Shiva Foundation offers some heful articles and answers to common questions:
www.goodgrief.org/grief/index.html

The Grief Recovery Institute has some useful articles (look down the left hand side of the page):
www.grief.net/ArticleIndex.html

Finding others in the same situation
The internet also offers a way for widows and widowers to talk to each other through various support forums and email lists. 

Online support groups have a number of disadvantages to be sure. If you’re halfway across the continent from those with whom you’re corresponding, it’s awfully hard to go out for coffee. And text messages can be a poor substitute for a hug.

But there are also a lot of benefits to joining an online bereavement group. There are often enough people on a discussion forum or email list that there are bound to be some who’ve shared the same feelings and have valuable advice.  Because it’s easy to be online from home, and because people log in from different timezones, chances are good that someone will be around – even in the middle of the night. And it can be freeing to share some feelings and thoughts that seem less ‘acceptable’ with those who are miles away.

It’s not a substitute for in-person groups or grief counselling, but these groups can help to fill a void. Here are two sites that offer contact with others going through the same grief process:

GriefNet.org
rivendell.org/
From their site: GriefNet.org is an Internet community of persons dealing with grief, death, and major loss. We have 47 e-mail support groups and two web sites. Our integrated approach to on-line grief support provides help to people working through loss and grief issues of many kinds.

WidowNet
www.fortnet.org/WidowNet/
From their site: Thank you for visiting WidowNet, an information and self-help resource for, and by, widows and widowers.

Topics covered include grief, bereavement, recovery, and other information helpful to people, of all ages, religious backgrounds and sexual orientations, who have suffered the death of a spouse or life partner.

Our own forums here at 50Plus.com also offer a network of peers who often have time to lend an ear or send a good thought. 

Try posting in the relationships forum at discuss.50plus.com.